Dream Big

So last night in Charlotte at my uncles house I was sleeping in a little antique bed in the room that his daughter abandoned in favor of the bigger, more grown up room. There were discarded toys laying around and I wondered before dozing off how my surroundings would affect my dreams. Well, it wasnt fun and games. Quite the contrary I was an accessory to murder, of my good friend, in his home. I wasn't the trigger girl but I was there and I didn't stop it. I remember him laying on the floor all small and dead and feeling really, really bad. So I went to my dream shrink at dreammoods.com and it said this:

To dream that you have committed a murder, indicates that you are putting an end to an old habit and your former ways of thinking. Consider how the victim represents aspects of yourself that you want to destroy or eliminate.

So apparently your surroundings do not affect your dreams (duh) because you are asleep when you're dreaming and it's all from your subconcious. Holla at me Mr. Jung! We need to have a chiz-at.

During the trip from Reston,VA last night my dad and I were finally in the car alone together to talk, so for 6 hours we re-hashed and buried issues from the past and talked about the next steps that we both need to take. He has to kick cancers ass, and I need to move forward with my education, career, and finally begin to cultivate my talents and harness my potential. More importantly I need to become independent, and it seems the relationship I've been in for the last 2 years will need to change in order for those things to happen. Said dead friend still lives with his parents, and although he is financially independant that same house has been keeping him safe for 24 years, which is something I have never been able to experience. So I merely murdered his support structure in favor of the wild and wily woods that I now need to enter, on my own.